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Posts Tagged ‘life’

I really need to update this more.

Sorry that I’ve been MIA for so long. Life kind of took over. Since my last post I’ve been loving life, spending a lot of time at the Library with my readings, writing essays and jetting off to New York City for the weekend…

New York City. It was only the most amazing experience of my life. I don’t think the city tops London for me (I will never be able to get over the fact that NYC is in the United States), but my Broadway, aka HAIR exxperience was beyond words. We met, tammed and took pictures with the entire cast. We met our IDOLS. At the show we DANCED and SANG on stage with the cast and many other audience members and we sang the last minute of Let the Sunshine In with Will Swenson’s arms around us (us being Ally and I). That moment on stage will forever be the happiest moment of our lives. At stage door that night (we went both Friday and Saturday…we had to meet Gavin Creel!) Allison Case showed up to get on the bus with the rest of the cast to DC for the National Equality March on the following Sunday. We didn’t think we’d meet her so seeing her there was one of my highlights of the trip. She’s so wonderful and I hate that she’s injured, it truly breaks my heart. Oh, and Caissie Levy (our fellow Canadian in the Tribe) is amazing, wonderful, spectacular…she’s every positive adjective in the book. She recognised us when we ran on stage after the show on saturday and both nights she talked with us for at least 5 minutes and it was amazing and ahhhhh.

I could go on forever about how wonderful they all are… I have to force myself to stop.  But honestly. Best night of my life.

Since then I’ve been doing a lot of essay writing, dealing with broken down computers (agian), the usual. I bought one of those mini netbook things because the idea of relying on library computers for a month again stresses me out, so it was worth the $250 I spent yesterday afternoon.

Anyway, I must go get ready for my favourite class ever now (autobiography seminar… I love everything about it; the topic, the prof, the discussion, the fact that it’s a 25-person seminar and not a 100-person lecture…).

peace, love, life.

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So,  I’ve been absent recently. I have no excuse other than that I have been at work every day since the beginning of May and therefore, not on the computer very often, because once I get home from work, where I stare at a computer screen all day, the last thing I want to do is go on the computer.

So, there.

Nothing much has happened since I got off school. I re-decorated my room, which is nice because, well, my room’s nice now. I also went to kingston for a weekend to visit friends which resulted in A LOT of drunken pictures, which are hilarious and surprisingly some of the best pictures of us…funny how that works…

But most of all, I’ve been listening and obsessing over the Broadway revival of the 1968 musical, HAIR. Words can honestly not describe the amount of awesome that radiates from the beautiful human beings that make up this new cast. There’s Gavin Creel, the beautiful, charming, marriage equality activist who plays the main character, Claude; Will Swenson, hilarious, witty and the perfect Burger; and my favourite…Allison Case. She only has a small role, but when you watch her, you cannot take your eyes off her. I’ve only seen youtube clips, but I swear she radiates the emotion of the entire cast through her face…it’s brilliant. I want to grow up to be her.

Now I just need to get to new york to see this cast…my life will not be complete otherwise.

Peace. Flowers. Freedom. Happiness. and of course…

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I feel like one.

If anyone read my blog before beda, they’ll know that I have had a LOT of disappointments this year. Nothing drastic, but drastic enough that I’ve cried a good amount of tears about. A few examples:

  1. I got cut from the varsity Figure Skating team at my uni. This particularly sucked because I had skated my entire life and besides school and my extra-curriculars there it was pretty much the only thing I did. When you’re so invested in something you generally want to choose when you stop doing that something. I didn’t get to choose when I stopped skating, the coach of varsity did. I still miss skating so, so much… it sucks. But, of course, I still care a lot about the girls on the team because some of them are my really good friends, one is my housemate (with whom I had skated since we were 7 <3).
  2. I didn’t get OC. OC is a position generally for third year students in ArtSci at my university who are hired after being Gaels to plan Orientation for the following year. I really, really wanted to be OC because Frosh Week at my school is the greatest thing EVER. I always put my heart and soul into everything I do, and this was just another one of those times that my heart was broken. I think I cried for about a week. I have a few friends who got the position and I still can’t look at their photos from OC events because it makes me uber sad, although I support and am extremely proud of those who got it. We love our OCs! We love our OCs!
  3. I didn’t get NEWTS OC. NEWTS OC is a position open to all students to help organise orientation for New and Transfer students at my Uni. I applied because, I mean, why the hell not? It was a long shot because I wasn’t a NEWT, nor was I a Gecko, so I was really just winging it. I wasn’t really torn up about this one, but it’s another to add to the list of my disappointments this year.
  4. Finally, I didn’t get a job at the Common Ground, TAMS or the QLC. This was the latest blow to my self esteem. I applied for a whole bunch of jobs within my school, two with student government services and one with the library. I tried to remain optimistic, like I was with everything I went out for this year, because I thought that I would at least be offered one of the three minimum wage campus jobs I applied for. I even got second round interviews and everything. The lists were posted today and, of course – because apparently lifehates me this year – I didn’t get any of them.

I’m not necessarily upset about not getting any of the jobs I applied for, I can get over that easily enough. In fact, I’m over it already. But I just so tired of all of the failed attempts and the subsequent disappointments that have come along with them.

I know that life is full of disappointments (good god I need a thesaurus) and I should get used to it because life gets much harder than this. But I mean, COME ON, UNIVERSE! Cut me some slack! In high school – and even in first year – I was just so used to all of my extra-curricular things working out; I was one of the big fish at my high school. Now I’m still a big fish, but I’m in a sea with whales and sharks and giant squids and nothing I do can get the attention of my superiors. Its catch and release. I take the bait, suffer for it, but I’m not quite big enough to be eaten yet, so they throw me back into the ocean that is my school with all of the other sad little fishies. I want to be dinner…

Okay, so its not a perfect metaphor, but you get my drift.

I just really thought that I’d get one of those jobs and I’d feel like my time here was worth more than just my degree, because that’s not the only reason why you go to university. At least it’s not the main reason I’m here.

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    Growing up. Everyone has to do it, no one wants to do it. Reality is a crappy, crappy thing, although there are definitely some significant pros to being a legal adult…

    I think I feel a pro/con list coming on! *gets out yellow legal pad”

    legalpad_comingsoon

    Cooking, ohhhhhhhh cooking. You know, most of the time I love cooking. It can be fun and relaxing and experimental; but when you have to do it every day and three times a day for the past eight months it gets so tiresome. It was fun for the first few weeks or so, but then I ran out of produce and had to go grocery shopping. This similar cycle continued, as did my cycle of dinners, lunches and breakfasts. I cannot count the number of stir-fries or falafels or quesadillas or bowls of pesto pasta I’ve consumed this year and on a student’s budget you cannot really afford to have anything more exotic. It’s come to the point in the year when I don’t want to eat anything because it means I have to cook dinner, and with studying you feel guilty cooking because you know that you wasted an hour feeding yourself when you could have been revising the New Critics for your Literary Theory and Criticism course.

    I know, I know, “welcome to the next 60-odd years of your life, Sam”, right? *sigh* I know, but I don’t want life to come! I’d love it if I could pause life in the summer between years in uni. I want an unlimited amount of time to read books and have fun being my 19-year-old self without the pressures of school and life and life after school. I want my dad to keep doing my taxes and supporting me and I want my mom to cook me dinner and…

    Okay, never mind. The comfort and security sounds great, but despite the constant cooking, monotonous meals, never ending homework and painful hangovers that are a part of college, growing up and making my own life is so incredibly worth it.

    but it would be nice if mom and dad invite me over for (at least) one meal a week.

    🙂

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    Life.
    It’s coming at me really quickly right now and I don’t have the time to find the motivation to do anything about it.
    School is so close to being finished for the summer and I do not want to tackle the heaps of work that I have to do in the next two weeks.
    Two weeks. That’s absolutely wild.
    I need life to pause right now so I can finish all of my work without stressing.
    Can you do that for me, Life?
    No??? Didn’t think so, you useless piece of garbage. *sigh*

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