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Posts Tagged ‘work’

So,  I’ve been absent recently. I have no excuse other than that I have been at work every day since the beginning of May and therefore, not on the computer very often, because once I get home from work, where I stare at a computer screen all day, the last thing I want to do is go on the computer.

So, there.

Nothing much has happened since I got off school. I re-decorated my room, which is nice because, well, my room’s nice now. I also went to kingston for a weekend to visit friends which resulted in A LOT of drunken pictures, which are hilarious and surprisingly some of the best pictures of us…funny how that works…

But most of all, I’ve been listening and obsessing over the Broadway revival of the 1968 musical, HAIR. Words can honestly not describe the amount of awesome that radiates from the beautiful human beings that make up this new cast. There’s Gavin Creel, the beautiful, charming, marriage equality activist who plays the main character, Claude; Will Swenson, hilarious, witty and the perfect Burger; and my favourite…Allison Case. She only has a small role, but when you watch her, you cannot take your eyes off her. I’ve only seen youtube clips, but I swear she radiates the emotion of the entire cast through her face…it’s brilliant. I want to grow up to be her.

Now I just need to get to new york to see this cast…my life will not be complete otherwise.

Peace. Flowers. Freedom. Happiness. and of course…

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I feel like one.

If anyone read my blog before beda, they’ll know that I have had a LOT of disappointments this year. Nothing drastic, but drastic enough that I’ve cried a good amount of tears about. A few examples:

  1. I got cut from the varsity Figure Skating team at my uni. This particularly sucked because I had skated my entire life and besides school and my extra-curriculars there it was pretty much the only thing I did. When you’re so invested in something you generally want to choose when you stop doing that something. I didn’t get to choose when I stopped skating, the coach of varsity did. I still miss skating so, so much… it sucks. But, of course, I still care a lot about the girls on the team because some of them are my really good friends, one is my housemate (with whom I had skated since we were 7 <3).
  2. I didn’t get OC. OC is a position generally for third year students in ArtSci at my university who are hired after being Gaels to plan Orientation for the following year. I really, really wanted to be OC because Frosh Week at my school is the greatest thing EVER. I always put my heart and soul into everything I do, and this was just another one of those times that my heart was broken. I think I cried for about a week. I have a few friends who got the position and I still can’t look at their photos from OC events because it makes me uber sad, although I support and am extremely proud of those who got it. We love our OCs! We love our OCs!
  3. I didn’t get NEWTS OC. NEWTS OC is a position open to all students to help organise orientation for New and Transfer students at my Uni. I applied because, I mean, why the hell not? It was a long shot because I wasn’t a NEWT, nor was I a Gecko, so I was really just winging it. I wasn’t really torn up about this one, but it’s another to add to the list of my disappointments this year.
  4. Finally, I didn’t get a job at the Common Ground, TAMS or the QLC. This was the latest blow to my self esteem. I applied for a whole bunch of jobs within my school, two with student government services and one with the library. I tried to remain optimistic, like I was with everything I went out for this year, because I thought that I would at least be offered one of the three minimum wage campus jobs I applied for. I even got second round interviews and everything. The lists were posted today and, of course – because apparently lifehates me this year – I didn’t get any of them.

I’m not necessarily upset about not getting any of the jobs I applied for, I can get over that easily enough. In fact, I’m over it already. But I just so tired of all of the failed attempts and the subsequent disappointments that have come along with them.

I know that life is full of disappointments (good god I need a thesaurus) and I should get used to it because life gets much harder than this. But I mean, COME ON, UNIVERSE! Cut me some slack! In high school – and even in first year – I was just so used to all of my extra-curricular things working out; I was one of the big fish at my high school. Now I’m still a big fish, but I’m in a sea with whales and sharks and giant squids and nothing I do can get the attention of my superiors. Its catch and release. I take the bait, suffer for it, but I’m not quite big enough to be eaten yet, so they throw me back into the ocean that is my school with all of the other sad little fishies. I want to be dinner…

Okay, so its not a perfect metaphor, but you get my drift.

I just really thought that I’d get one of those jobs and I’d feel like my time here was worth more than just my degree, because that’s not the only reason why you go to university. At least it’s not the main reason I’m here.

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    Growing up. Everyone has to do it, no one wants to do it. Reality is a crappy, crappy thing, although there are definitely some significant pros to being a legal adult…

    I think I feel a pro/con list coming on! *gets out yellow legal pad”

    legalpad_comingsoon

    Cooking, ohhhhhhhh cooking. You know, most of the time I love cooking. It can be fun and relaxing and experimental; but when you have to do it every day and three times a day for the past eight months it gets so tiresome. It was fun for the first few weeks or so, but then I ran out of produce and had to go grocery shopping. This similar cycle continued, as did my cycle of dinners, lunches and breakfasts. I cannot count the number of stir-fries or falafels or quesadillas or bowls of pesto pasta I’ve consumed this year and on a student’s budget you cannot really afford to have anything more exotic. It’s come to the point in the year when I don’t want to eat anything because it means I have to cook dinner, and with studying you feel guilty cooking because you know that you wasted an hour feeding yourself when you could have been revising the New Critics for your Literary Theory and Criticism course.

    I know, I know, “welcome to the next 60-odd years of your life, Sam”, right? *sigh* I know, but I don’t want life to come! I’d love it if I could pause life in the summer between years in uni. I want an unlimited amount of time to read books and have fun being my 19-year-old self without the pressures of school and life and life after school. I want my dad to keep doing my taxes and supporting me and I want my mom to cook me dinner and…

    Okay, never mind. The comfort and security sounds great, but despite the constant cooking, monotonous meals, never ending homework and painful hangovers that are a part of college, growing up and making my own life is so incredibly worth it.

    but it would be nice if mom and dad invite me over for (at least) one meal a week.

    🙂

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    You know those days when you wake up, it’s surprisingly gorgeous outside, and you have school work to do that prevents you from enjoying the weather and the fresh air?

    Today is one of those days.

    For the past couple of days it’s been raining like crazy (as you would know if you’ve been reading my blog since BEDA began), therefore I had not showered for a good 2 days (personal hygiene does not matter when you’re only seeing your housemates), really gotten dressed at all and I have obviously not been outdoors. I was beginning to lose sense of all space and time, being cooped up for so long. and breaking routine is not good for my sanity. So, this morning, when I opened my blinds to see a unexpected, beautiful sunny day, there was no way I could focus and do any of the work that I had to do today. I procrastinated for a very long time; watching episodes of [scrubs], putting away laundry, cleaning my room, showering, getting dressed, snapping pictures on dailybooth…

    Eventually I decided to sit down at my desk and begin work on my take-home exam that’s due on the 16th, but found myself severely distracted by the beautiful day that lay outside my window. I was all dressed (in a rather cute outfit, may I add) with no place to go, so why not go somewhere, I thought. I couldn’t waste a beautiful day like today, so I gathered my things and headed outside for a stroll.

    iphone-photos1

    In my experience, when feeling like this, a walk can be extremely beneficial to the successful completion of work. When you’re distracted by what’s going on outside your study bubble, I find that it’s best to take a walk for about an hour either through your neighbourhood, to some stores, or through a nearby valley or park, because honestly you’d probably spend about an hour (if not more) dreaming about what you could be doing instead of your work.

    iphone-photos-copy

    Today I opted for the stroll down to the shops in downtown Kingston, mostly because there’s an Indigo, several Starbucks and an Urban Outfitters to entertain me. I believe that a walk is best broken up by some good window shopping (and maybe some actual shopping) so your thoughts aren’t completely occupied by the things you have to do, and thoughts of the things you want to do (ie. shopping) can be engaged, thereby getting them out of the way so you can truly focus on the work you’ll be doing in the near future.

    Now, I know this is beginning to sound like yet another procrastination tool (I’m starting to sound like a professional procrastinator already, only 5 days into BEDA…my goodness), but I believe that taking a walk is a constructive way to gather thoughts and to meditate on the things that you want to accomplish when you actually sit down to work. From experience I can honestly say that going on a walk has definitely helped rid my distractions and allowed me to successfully complete school related tasks on more than one occasion.

    So, next time you feel distracted and unfulfilled in regards to your dreadful day of study indoors, avoid cabin fever by venturing into the outside world and doing the things you don’t think you can do while studying, because in the grand scheme of things, it will help you focus.

    Now…dinner then work.

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    Life.
    It’s coming at me really quickly right now and I don’t have the time to find the motivation to do anything about it.
    School is so close to being finished for the summer and I do not want to tackle the heaps of work that I have to do in the next two weeks.
    Two weeks. That’s absolutely wild.
    I need life to pause right now so I can finish all of my work without stressing.
    Can you do that for me, Life?
    No??? Didn’t think so, you useless piece of garbage. *sigh*

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    [un] read Monday’s RELS 210: Hebrew Scriptures material, complete Assignment #2.

    [deux] review and make study notes for ENGL 226: Shakespeare Midterm on Thursday. Half done, complete tomorrow.

    [trois] go over ENGL 292: Intro to Literary Criticism essay prompts, choose one. 

    [quatre] start researching databases for RELS 223: Buddhism possible research essay topics.

    [cinq] finish Counterknowledge.

    [six] pick topic for ENGL 241: Restoration and 18th Century Lit. Rasselas paper. 

    [sept] get a life. cannot be achieved in one weekend.

    [huit] call nanny. 

    [neuf] sleep…

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